Anyone who knows me knows I place family above all else. And sometimes to the absolute irritation of my siblings (I have a brother and a sister) I have been seriously overprotective of them through our lives, especially when we were younger. I survived some very dark childhood experiences which both ignited that protective fire I felt towards them AND built walls around my heart and isolated me from them at the same time.
Nothing hurts more for me than being disconnected from the people I love – it’s continuous and unadulterated torture! It hurts. It burns. It fills my brain and all the corners of my soul until it is resolved. I am learning, slowly and deliberately, to manage this kind of stuff because, as my bestie put it: sometimes people are just assholes and there’s nothing we can do about it!
As such amazingly different people each of my siblings and I are, each with our own deep hurts, it has been a difficult struggle to build the stunning relationship I have with my sister now. But if what we have now is because of everything that’s happened, then in some way, it was all worth it.
My sister is my hero. She is vivacious, fun, fearless, loyal to the point of it being a flaw, she’s an awesome mom, great friend and loving partner and homemaker. She is creative, driven and effortlessly graceful and I have always admired her … of course the fact that she’s the mom of my precious and stunning little niece completely puts her over the top!
Roger, her partner, has grown on me like a barnacle (*tongue in cheek there Rog) and we too have built a bond based on mutual respect and quick-witted banter – sometimes it gets a bit heavy and we’re told to calm down, but he knows and I know and that’s ok.
My sweetest Amy-Lee … for you my baby, I will kill the bull! I adore you – and not entirely because you’re the spitting image of your mom in characteristics and image – you have the same confidence, albeit wavering at times, grace and fearlessness … hold onto your self assurance and know you have an army of people who love you at your back!